Monday morning: I have a different answer to the question and have edited this post in light of new thinking about the subject. Thanks for your comments. They have helped me revise this post. I have left the original post because I want to leave the comments.
Why do I care about RA’s romantic life? This is not a blog post with pretty pictures.
I know that there are probably good reasons that we don’t know anything about RA’s private life. It’s none of our business in the first place. In the second place, it might change the way some people think about him. Putting information about yourself out in the public can do that.
Writing a blog is a risky business. I thought a lot before I wrote about “obsessing”over RA’s romantic life. I know the questions I have are questions many fans have, but because we are fans and we don’t want to take the chance that we could hurt RA by speculating, we keep the questions to ourselves for the most part. As of Monday morning I now include myself among them. I decided to take the post down.
Professor Servetus has taught me to look inward to see why I am affected by Mr. Armitage. She is very brave, to me. I think it is hard to reveal personal feelings to an anonymous public, even when you are pseudonymous yourself. Monday morning comment: As you can see by my other comments, revealing my feelings is not hard for me. What is hard is identifying them and being honest about them.
The problem I have with writing about my feelings in relation to Mr. Armitage’s personal life is that it would only reveal more speculation on my part which might not be in his best interests. Not because I think he or anyone he knows reads this, but public is public. As of Monday morning, I think I know what my feelings are and it doesn’t really involve speculation on my part. I was wrong about that.
I started this blog to examine the connections among my various current and past obsessions, particularly the similarities between Hugh Jackman and Richard Armitage. In doing that I hit on what I believed to be a difference between them – how they communicate with the public about their private lives.
I think I have identified why the lack of information about Mr. Armitage’s private life annoys me. I think it’s because I am a notoriously open person. Obviously I’m hiding my identity for blogging purposes, but other than that I don’t keep much private. I guess that’s why I like Mr. Jackman’s seemingly open style. To me, keeping secrets is unhealthy. Not other people’s secrets, just mine. I acknowledge that other people don’t feel the same way. And I respect that in RL, so why should I not respect Mr. Armitage’s feelings? That is why I took the post down.
Until very recently I lived in New York City my whole life. I work in NYC. I’ve heard it all, believe me. In my experience there is only one reason that someone doesn’t talk about their private life and that is because the person thinks you could misunderstand it. An adult who lives with her parents and spends most of her time with them might not want everyone to know that. A man whose sex life consists of watching porn, might not want to talk about it. A woman or man who is celibate also might not wish to share that. Although some don’t care and DO share things that are sometimes TMI! LOL! I seriously have heard it all! I’ve had friends come out of the closet to me. I’ve had acquaintances share the fact that they are virgins with me. But these people were not putting the information out in a press release.
However, there is an aspect with a celebrity, a public figure, which the person might want to keep private. When your private life involves another person the celebrity might not wish to make that person’s life searchable on Google. Annabel Capper, for example? Look at how everyone wanted to know about her once she was seen out with RA! Since Mr. Armitage is, by all accounts, a really caring, decent man, he would most likely not want to involve another person in his publicity circus. He probably doesn’t want his parents to see nonsense about him splashed around gossip mags. So I understand why he would want to keep things quiet.
Added Monday: Thanks to everyone’s comments I see now that I was wrong to make the assumption that not talking about something means you are HIDING something. You might just not want to talk about it. Which is everyone’s right, even public figures.